Gratitude

 

March 6, 2026

 

                Master Dogen Zenji says the most important task is to study the matter of birth and death. While watching some British hospital show last night there was an elderly man, a few years younger than me, who suffered a stroke. Next to him, lay a young baby boy in his mother’s carriage: birth and death. We are each born to grow, flower, and die. It is life’s way. For each of us, this is our path. What we make of it is ours.

 

                There is an old phrase, “Carpe Diem.” In effect, it means having a “live for the moment” attitude. Seize the day for tomorrow may not come and yesterday is gone.  Yes. For us Elders, tomorrow is a hope; each morning I am grateful for the sun to rise, and I am awake to experience it. A sip of coffee, a chat with Shukke, petting our dogs…grateful for it all.  My practice is to live knowing I will die. This is the knowledge of being a human being. I may not be here tomorrow. And so?

 

                The “so what?” is to make each day count by some measure we each bring to our lives. For me, since Vietnam, it has been to be in service to others whether as a psychotherapist or priest. Now, pretty much retired, it is with such writing as this, such kindness as caring for wife and pups. I am grateful for this everyday opportunity.

 

                Be a blessing,

 

                Daiho

 

War Again

 

War Again

 

                Again, we are at war, again without congressional approval. Our dictator just makes a nod, and our war machine goes into action.  This sort of war does not involve ground troops and so seems more sanitary for our side. Jets, guided missiles and drones: pilots rarely see who they kill. But kill they do.  I oppose war unless we have little choice.  The Buddha Way does not oppose self-defense.

 

                Still, it is always a terrible choice to kill. Our dictator has never served, has never had to engage in combat. He dodged the draft multiple times. What does he know but a life of ease and wealthy privilege? Yet he unleashes the most powerful killing machine the world has ever seen without the authority to do so. This, among many things, makes him less a president and more a dangerous dictator.

 

                Plainly, he should be removed from office.

 

                Daiho

Living a Life

 

Living a Life

 

Living a life where all of life is a practice is just living a life with all our senses awake and receptive to the universe around us. I sit here at my desk with fingers wrapped in bandages. My back aches. I settle in.  I notice my breath as it relaxes. Nothing special. Yet it is.

 

We are fortunate to be born a human being. Millions of kalpas have passed with all kinds of beings evolving and here we are. Wow! Moreover, we are very fortunate to have encountered the Buddha Way. I am so grateful for all of my life experiences; the good and the bad, grateful to all of the people in my life over the decades. Sometimes I just feel so overwhelmed with it all.

 

It is the simplest things in my life that humble me: a bird at my feeder, witnessing a white winged dove in her nest with babies.  My loving wife offering me coffee or just checking on me. Maybe just standing up without falling down. Life is miraculous, it’s that simple. Our practice is to enter it completely without reservation.

 

May you be well and free from suffering

 

Daiho

Dokusan Day

 

February 26, 2026

 

Good Day to All,

 

                This morning, I had some growths removed from two of my right-hand fingers. They are bandaged but still numb and bleeding a bit. The thing is I only have use of my right hand, so typing is an interesting practice of mindful attention! Anyway, today is my day to offer dokusan to any who wish to present themselves. I enjoy such moments with students and any others wishing to speak with me.  For an appointment text me at 575-644-7420.

 

                Have a great day!

Daiho

Expectations

 

February 25, 2026

 

Today will be a warm day here in Las Cruces, NM. Maybe near 80 degrees F. This morning, I rode my Trike down to Litas’s and had her sew a few patches onto my cut. She’s a great biker herself; also rides a trike.  We talked about families. She’s Mexican American and owns her own shop. After that I rode over to our local Walmart and greeted people while sitting on the park bench.

 

“Beings are numberless, I vow to free them” our vow goes. So I greet people, ask how they are, and sometimes entertain a conversation. We often discuss our gratitude for waking up in the morning since many are elderly like me. These are small, but not insignificant, musings together. They are connections within our small community. And while most return my greetings return, some don’t, choosing to walk on by. I’ve mentioned this before in other posts. I guess it still bothers me a bit, but then, who am I to have such an expectation. All part of my practice today.

 

                Take care all,

                Daiho

Sacred?

 

February 24, 2026

 

Sacred?

 

                This morning early, before Zen Service and after, I sat outside with my wild birds and the sounds of the small city of Las Cruces, NM waking up. It is a delicious experience to go from silence to the sounds of traffic in the distance, knowing that other human beings are getting up and going about their business. This is followed by our two Shih Tzus and Shukke poking their heads out the door letting me know its time to come in, drink our morning espresso coffees, exchange stories about our night, plans for the day, and of course, the Webster and Oxford “Words of the Day.”

 

                I want to say this is a sacred ritual, but it is just what it is: nothing special. It is just everyday life. Theologians often talk about experiences or places as “Sacred” or “Profane.”  These come about in discussions of the “holy.”  From a Zen perspective these distinctions are problematic as they seem to create a distinction of experience. Yet even we Zen people hold some such distinctions when we talk about the Two Truths: Absolute and Relative.

 

                However, In Zen, the Absolute and the Relative are not separate, but seamlessly inter-are to borrow from Thich Nhat Hahn. They are neither sacred or profane in particular. We simply practice being fully here and now regardless of place or type of experience. But as human beings we too often seek to make something special out of these. We do this through developing a sense of reverence.  We approach an altar or zafu with a sense of reverence. For some reason it is important for us to make somethings and experiences “special.”

 

                What does this do for us? For one thing it can prepare us for something, perhaps opening us to something we may experience as special, differing from ordinary experience.  Frankly it is a serious mistake to do so as it maintains the duality of our existence. From a Zen point of view, we might say all experience and all places are “sacred.”  This would be the Zen of everyday.  Feeding birds, sipping coffee; these are no different from sitting Zazen or bowing at our altars. As such they are none special in themselves. What may be special is how present we are in each.

 

Be well,

Daiho

The Way Less Travelled

 

The Way of Zen is a Way Less Travelled

This morning Shukke and I sat together sipping espresso coffee, exchanging stories about our night, enjoying our two Shih Tzus, exploring the words of today, and laughing.  She is now in Retreat, and I am writing to you. Before we each retired, such mornings were uncommon.  We would dress for work, eat a hurried breakfast and leave home, not unlike the rest of the world of people our age.  Yet there was something different about us.

                We were both on so-called “spiritual” paths. We took time to meditate. We took time to reflect, look deeply inwardly, and take risks. The risk of doing something different than most, the risk of leaving a secure job, moving to a different state, and building new lives. Such risk taking is not uncommon in the world of Zen.  We are an independent lot.

                When someone joins us for a Zen service, I tell them they are free to recite the vows, chant the sutra, or not. I simply ask them to sit quietly in the posture taught by Master Dogen Zenji. Zazen is our practice. After tea and dharma talk each is offered an opportunity to ask questions, challenge the teaching, offer an alternative, etc. For religious practice this is uncommon, but I believe it is healthy for the establishment of something that will deepen a participant as they continue along their way.

                There are risks in such practice. There is no way to predict what will come up in the heart and mind of someone beginning to take on Zen. A long-ago trauma may arise, feelings of being harmed, being vulnerability.  On the other hand, a beginner may become completely bored, find the teachings irrelevant in their lives and after a few weeks, leave the practice. Some few may actually take on the practice in earnest, engage the teacher and others, and more importantly, take the risk of a deep dive into themselves.  This will be their way less travelled. They may find themselves alone as others (including their family) may be unable to relate. There certainly are risks here. My teacher told me early on in my practice with him I would likely divorce as my wife at the time was against me taking up Zen. As it happens, I divorced.

The way less travelled always comes at a cost. Yet the benefits are truly a treasure. Learning to be upright, knowing we will often fail, violate a precept, but get back up again the stronger for it. These are the lessons of being human, the lessons learned along the way.  I invite all to sit Zazen in the morning and evening. I invite all to take the path less traveled and, in the process, become a far more authentic human being.

Be well.

 

Teachings

 

February 1, 2026

With Palms Together,

There are times I wish I weren’t a Zen priest. Today is such a time. I’ve been involved with Zen for around six decades. In that time, I have not known a period within which there has been no fighting within the ranks of teachers. This is a very, very sad situation indeed.

                I can understand such within the ranks of students who have not received priesthood ordination; they are still within training. But fully ordained priests? What is up with that? Is it simply not possible to let our rumors, inuendo, and lineage judgements fall away?  Apparently not. I confess a couple decades ago, I myself got into it with the American Zen Teachers Association over their treatment of my Dharma grandfather Matsuoka Roshi. Petty, petty squabbles are irrelevant to the practice of Zen. I let that all fall away and focused my attention on my practice and that of my students.  I believe this is where our attention should focus and not on whether we believe some teacher is a quack, from a discredited lineage, or other such things.

                At nearly eighty years old, I am certain Zen will survive and hopefully flourish. That is my hope anyway. If there is a test, let that test be in our practice and frankly, in my opinion, that is enough.

Daiho

 

February 3, 2026

With Palms Together,

Today is Tuesday. This morning, we practiced Zazen at 6:00 AM, and now we are having installed a battery system that runs off our solar panels. We will effectively be off the grid here in Las Cruces, NM.  I teach an Advanced Zen Buddhism class this evening.  Such is my day. 

                My life as a Zen priest has been both rich and rewarding, as well as seriously challenging. Just because one is a priest does not mean one is not still a human being and as such, fraught with all the strengths and weakness associated with it. The thing about both the strengths and weaknesses is they are both teachers: both require humility gained from deep introspection.

                When we approach our everyday lives, such as in my case just now, writing to you, I must be aware of myself, my message, you as reader, and so on. I must choose words you will know and ideas you might relate to. I might use words you don’t know, concepts perhaps alien to you, but with the desire to teach, perhaps awaken, and at bottom, communicate.

                Of course, it is also on you to choose to read after the first few sentences, on you to relate, agree, disagree, challenge, and so on. I trust my skill, but also come to you with humility. Writing and reading are wondrous, ancient means of coming together as people and societies.

                May your day be filled with wonder,

Daiho

               

February 4, 2026

With palms together,

                The morning air was brisk today as I sat outside just before dawn. Sitting outside, as the Buddha did, is a remarkable experience. Silence is thunder, the thunder of direct experience of the world around me.  There is the occasional sound of a car or truck in the distance, but nearby, sleeping households with just myself and the moon and stars. Not even the birds are awake.  Just me, myself and I coalescing together then at some point, falling away.

                This falling away in hindsight seems magical because it is not conscious. There is no attempt to make it happen. Attention on my breath, yes, a release of my muscles of sorts yes, a feeling of joining, perhaps. Something like that.  In any event, the universe is there inseparable, complete, just as it is.

                I suggest sitting outside in the open, practicing Zazen, and welcoming the dawn as it arises in the East.

Be well,

Daiho

                February 15, 2026

                With palms together,

                When the world around us seems to be falling apart and threatening, rather than hiding we must stand upright in the face of it. Standing upright takes courage, it takes character, moral character. Which is to say, the character of our precepts, especially that found in the Four Bodhisattva Vows which we recite each day:

Beings are numberless, I vow to free them

Delusions are inexhaustible, I vow to end them

Dharma gates are boundless, I vow to enter them

The buddha way is unsurpassable, I vow to realize it.

There are no greater vows than these. They offer us a selfless way to address our world. When we take it upon ourselves to free others, to end our delusions, to enter the Dharma, and to realize our buddha nature, we are upright warriors facing the darkness that surrounds us. Why? Because we are the light in that darkness. Be that light.

Daiho

Who Owns Our Bodies?

 Dear Readers,

For the record, I oppose abortion as a general rule since I support life. I also support the sanctity of privacy, freedom of choice, and a society where government has no business in our bedroom. I this regard, then, I support freedom of choice when it involves itself in our lives.  We do not criminally charge those who attempt suicide, nor do we issue Social Security and Medicaid cards to those not yet born.  So, I wonder of what use is a birth certificate?  Why not issue an embryo certificate instead?

Just a thought.

Daiho

Transparency

There are a few things a Zen priest or teacher ought not do besides the obvious, violating his/her vows, and one of them is hiding behavior.  It's akin to acts of omission, which is to say, lying by not telling the truth when not asked.  I have always believed in transparency. As a priest and Zen teacher believe I have an obligation to be as "up-front" with the public, and in particular, my students and readers, as possible and appropriate.  

As I write this, I worry how it will be read and what the consequences may be for sharing such intimate details about my life choices over the last year. But it will be what it will be.  As Vonnegut used to say, "So it goes."

For the last couple of decades, I have taken a drug called "Mirapex."  It is used to quell leg spasms and restless leg syndrome (RLS). Unfortunately for me, the drug has some rather toxic, if not malicious, side effects I was not made aware of which have deeply disturbed me, my wife and students, and now you, dear readers. There are several challenging side effects, but most relevant are two: a lowering of impulse control and an increase of addictive behaviors; frankly, a match made in hell. 

By writing about this drug, I am in no way excusing my behavior, but offering an explanation for it, as well as a warning to anyone reading this to stay away from Mirapex. It is a dangerous drug, and studies have shown it has caused many people to lose their homes, end their marriages, and otherwise rain down hell upon users.

I apologize for any and all I have harmed.

With deepest bows,

Daiho

Recluse

Readers,

Recently I've taken to being far more reclusive than ever before. I'm no longer on Facebook or other social media, do not keep my device glued to my hip, and am generally not particularly responsive to inquiries. I have found this new position to be quite liberating, although somewhat frustrating as a writer. Writers need readers, you know?

Anyway, the Zen of it is this: practice is key, not an audience. One teaches through one's life, not one's written word. 

So, when the bell is invited to ring, sit. Or practice kinhin. Or practice oryoki. Or practice samu. 

There is nothing more.

Be well.

Creation

Creation

 On the evening

Of the first day

I created myself.

"Self," I said, "Go

Forthwith

Take control

Of yourself

Name yourself

And all living

Things:

Be Kind\

Be Gentle

And Love

Your world."

All these things

I said to myself

And then went

On my way.

Daiho

2/13/2022

This Evening

This Evening 

On this evening

When the clock  

Strikes twelve

I will have lived

Three quarters of a century:

I haven't learned much.

daiho

2/12/22

The Crack

 The crack

Is is all too  often

Hidden

Somewhere

Behind this or that'

We can't find it

Or don't even know

Enough to look.

So we live out our lives

In darkness

Until something happens...

A door closes

A window opens

And the light gets in.

daiho

2/12/22

Morning

 With palms together, 

Sitting outside, it is 33 degrees. The fresh air is brisk to say the least. Zazen out of doors is nothing special really, the Buddha did it all of his life. Yet we westerners rarely take the Buddha’s way. I’ve heard students say it is uncomfortable, as if comfort is important to the practice. It is not. 

What’s important to the practice is the practice itself regardless of conditions. Sit like a mountain: all ancestors have taught this. Even if, as in my case, the mountain itself is unstable. Easy?  No. Necessary? Yes. To be a buddha, is to be a buddha in all directions and in all times.

Gassho 

Changes in the Order of Clear Mind Zen

 With palms together,

Recently I decided, rather abruptly, to resign my teaching position at the Order. Our new Head Teacher is Rev Marshall Daishin Tucker. I will not go into the particulars but suffice it to say my energy reserves are just not up to it. So, I will contain myself to teaching via this blog and other venues such as public lectures, radio interviews and the like.

With this I will remain Abbot of the Order and work with our Executive Committee to take us into this new year. We are meeting this morning to discuss possibilities and forge a direction. My sense is we have two major tasks: first, develop our organizational structure and second, work to build our membership. To support that last goal, I am suggesting we develop a membership application, policies regarding membership, and assign a membership director.

I will keep you posted as things unfold.

Be well, y'all

Daiho

The Streetcorner Hunger Project

 With Palms Together,

Student Shinrai has been purchasing and distributing bags of food for homeless persons on the street corners of Las Cruces for years. Recently the Order of Clear Mind Zen has decided to make this one of our Engaged Practices. We are calling it "The Streetcorner Hunger Project." This morning we distributed about twenty bags of food to homeless folk on street corners. If anyone would like to donate to this continuing project, please do so through our PayPal button on our website at www.clearmindzen.com.

1Chris Gasco

Merit

 Merit.

A funny thing happened to America recently. We have shifted direction on our moral compass. We were once a nation that held hard work and the strength of character and will to be considered ideals. We believed in merit, that one should be rewarded for one’s hard work and accomplishment, that people should rise in authority and responsibility based on that merit.

These ideals are being challenged. Merit itself is in question. People sometimes now hold that race, gender, and sheer luck have more to do with gain and social success than merit or anything else. And perhaps they do.

The notion that we are a nation of White male privilege and that the game is rigged from the start has seemingly gained ascendency. The notion of merit, then, simply has no place and may even be dangerous according to a price out of Princeton University. There is little to deny this supposition. Racism exists. Sexism exists. And those of the right color and gender do seem to get the breaks.

However, there is more to merit than business, social, or personal outcome. Merit is a consequence of effort, skill, creativity, and determination. To develop these qualities, I assert, is far more important than the external outcome of their application. They give rise to a sense of competence, personal value, and integrity. In short, they develop moral character.

The effort to attack merit as somehow racist or sexist leaves us believing we really need not work hard, study hard, or be creative in our approach to personal success. So, what are we left with? We shift the blame for our economic and social failures on those with priveledge. We do not feel the need to examine our own role in outcomes. It’s easy. Didn’t get the job or promotion? Blame the social structure. Why, I ask, try?

Again, simple: self respect. Belief in oneself. Gutsiness.

In a world of constant social and moral change, would it not be helpful to each of us to know we are capable in spite of whether or not we are rewarded? In truth, I don’t know, but I believe so.

Yours,

Intent and Critical Theory

 With palms together,

The Buddha Way teaches there are Three Poisons: Greed, Hatred, and Delusion and we address these with the Three Antidotes: Generosity, Love, and Wisdom.

Today I’d like to address an issue with one of the aspects of Critical Theory, derived from Postmodernism, and an underlying theoretical foundation of Critical Role Theory, as well as the Cancel Culture and Political Correctness movements. One of the core assumptions of the theory is this: “Language operates hierarchically through binaries, always placing one element above another...” and in discourse, “the speaker’s meaning has no more authority than the hearer’s interpretation and thus intention cannot outweigh impact.” In other words, the author’s “intentions are irrelevant” even when known. (Cynical Theories, Pluckrose, H and Lindsay, J., 2020 P.40).

Felt injuries of racism, sexism, ageism, and other prejudices often cause us to want to defend ourselves, counter attack, or otherwise be “made whole” through the courts. We may want to “cancel” the perpetrator of our felt injury, seek some form of restorative justice or some other compensation. Our subjective interpretation of the experience and its consequent pain and suffering may be tangible and visceral. . There is no question as to the painful effects of prejudice: economic. academic, psychological, etc.

The movements I refer to above are attempts to correct centuries of oppression. Members and advocates believe prejudice is structural to society and there is truth in this observation. That truth needs addressing, to be sure, yet, there are aspects to the way these movements attempt to address it that are, in my opinion, problematic. First, and perhaps foremost, are its broadly generalized assumptions. While racism and other prejudices, may be structural, it does not mean every person within a group of those identified as oppressive, are oppressive, racist or sexist. To claim the alternative is true is, itself prejudiced against individuals. Second, a vindictive approach to oppressors is hardly effective, it simply succeeds in making those identified more resistant and demands they entrench themselves even more deeply into their prejudicial state. Finally, such an approach is harmful to the oppressed as it disallows any real recovery from victimhood.

For Zen Buddhist and others, especially those in recovery, it is important to keep in mind (and heart), the power of forgiveness, Forgiveness of the effects of prejudicial acts against us requires a willingness to accept or understand the intent of the offender. Was the offense intended? Where was his or her mind? What was in his heart?

To suggest such questions are meaningless is to denigrate our humanity and place us in the same camp as the oppressor: prejudiced and wielding that prejudice with the power to harm. From a Buddhist point of view, karmic consequence follows intent, so intent is critical in understanding and we need understanding to more correctly address the situation. Buddha diagnosed and his treatment followed his diagnosis. To arrive at a functional and comprehensive diagnosis we must be comprehensive in our exploration and fact gathering. What good is a diagnosis that comes from missing data?

What Critical Theory and its Social Justice Warriors seem to refuse to do is look deeply with a willingness to examine intent, since intent is already assumed to be that of power and dominance. And if it weren’t? No matter, the effect of the words or actions is far more important, they say. The net effect of this is a never-ending conflict between binaries with little hope for conflict resolution, save to say the subjugation of the “other.”

A Place of Neither Hot or Cold

 With palms together,

A cold and rainy morning greets us in southern New Mexico. I am reminded of the koan where the student complains to the Master about heat and cold and the Master replies, to paraphrase, "Go to the place where there is neither hot or cold."

Where is that place? I wonder as I sit outside with the cold and rain. Hot and cold are simply words we apply to a feeling, rather, a sensory perception, and as such gives rise to thoughts and feelings. Isn't our brain a wonderful thing?

Sometimes.

It can warn us, bring us pleasure, pain, joy and sorrow. It is hard-wired to do so. As Zen practitioners it is up to us how we respond to its messages. We can complain, as did the student, we can deny the messages, and we can accept the messages for what they are: just thoughts. It is our relationship to our brain's messages that is so important: accept, deny, cope, or deal. The choice is ours and it is that place we should go.

The place of release, rather than mastery. As Master Uchiyama taught, we are to "open the hand of thought." Grasping is like tightening the bonds that hold us captive, recognizing we are our own jailers and practicing to release ourselves from our self created bonds is the way.

How? Releasing our thoughts is to let go of our thoughts, to let go of our thoughts is to settle into our bodies, turning our attention to what may be our three freedoms: posture, breath, and mind. And to do this, we simply stop: sit upright, breathe, and release the chain of thought.

Of course there is another answer to the question of hot and cold: cover or uncover our bodies as the temperatures require :)

Gassho

Be well.