Organ Mountain Zen



Monday, November 16, 2009

Refuge

With palms together,

Good Morning Everyone,



Often in the morning I ask , "What am I doing?" My answer, "I don't know."



Disciple KoMyo and I talked yesterday. During the Rohatsu sesshin, our seniors will confer. The Order will develop itself. For my part, I want to remain without a Zen Center. My practice is on the street and in the heart. My practice is about being peace. Buildings do not make for much of anything but a place to separate yourself from the everyday and in Zen, as in most spiritual practices, it is the everyday is everything.



Practice in the open, under the sky, on grass or sidewalks, and in parks is precisely how Buddha himself practiced. Today, with pace being so important and distraction being our singular human activity, we fail to learn about ourselves. We do not stop long enough to listen.



It is easy to fall prey to this. I just did. Its a kind of sickness, I think. The trouble is, it seems to define the contemporary human condition worldwide.



Clear Mind Zen is a refuge. To enter it is easy: simply turn off everything and just sit down and shut up.



Be well.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Blankets and Buddhas

With palms together,

Good Morning Everyone,



A cold front is moving across the desert and the morning air is sitting at 43 degrees. Shortly I will bundle-up and go outside to walk. We often say in Zen there is no hot or cold. Yet, there it is, The relative scale of the thermometer, the need for our bodies to remain within a certain range on that scale, demand action.



Four of us sat zazen Friday in the rotunda. The wind was blowing very hard, fallen leaves didn't just shuffle along, they absolutely ran! Each of us were forced to put on protective clothing. Again, the relative truth of things came into play.



For those of us convinced awakening frees us from such things, I say that sort of awakening is just another delusion. Air remains is both cold and not cold at the same time. Awakened beings get cold. They then cover up. No problem.



The moment we argue with the cold or with the heat or that we should somehow be little statues, immune to it all, we lose our buddhahood,. Master Dogen says practice is realization. What is practice? Doing what is there to do completely and without an alternative universe of appeal settling on our brow.



Time to bundle. Be well.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Moment in Time

With palms together,
Good Morning Everyone,

The dishes are put away, the dishwasher is re-loaded, my laundry is being washed, the coffee is brewed, and I am sitting just now in my Zendo. The window is open. Cool air flows onto my robed knee. It is refreshing.

I spent a lot of time last night just sitting. Its a wonderful way to experience no-time. Notice the language. I do not "spend" time. I do not experience "time". When I am "spending time" I am really not present as I am aware of the memory of one moment to the next, measuring one against another. When I do that there an be no now.

But when I experience "no-time" that is to say, I remain with the present moment, with no last moment, no next moment, no comparing, there can be no time.

What is it like to live without time? Boundless.

Be well.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Practice

With palms together,
Good Morning Everyone,

Those of you receiving this are what remains of my daily recipients list.

I have decided to step away from synagogue life, as I indicated earlier. My focus will be on my own practice as a Zen priest and theology student. Practice is a large matter residing in the intimate details. Practice is where our "shin" is, our heart/mind.

My practice, the deepest practice of all, is zazen.

I will post a bit more infrequently than in the past.

Practice periods are 10:30 Monday and Friday at Veteran's Park and at 9:00 AM at my home Zendo.

I encourage each of you to take up this practice daily in your home.

May you each be a blessing,

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

How is it?

With palms together,
Good Morning Everyone,


"When birth and death come, how do we avoid them?", Yunman was asked. And he replied, "Where are they?"

This is from Case 166 of Master Dogen's Koan collection. The capping verse goes,

"In arriving, there is no abode;
in departing, there is no destination.
Ultimately, how is it?
Here I have been all the time!"

This morning I entered the Zendo early and sat facing the wall. I decided not to bring a timer. I just sat. It is Veteran's Day today. We are asked to remember. I don't think so. I cast aside memories.

Zen is the practice of just being. We do not practice for today, tomorrow or due to something that happened yesterday. We practice for nothing. Zen practice is a constant letting go of things we think are true, or that we believe in, or that we experience. Sometimes it is a struggle to do so. This morning, for example, I could not find a cat carrier we had borrowed from friends. They asked to have it returned. Embarrassed for not already having done so, I frantically searched for the carrier, but it is no where to be found. I knew I needed to let go of it. Stepping out of the car to walk later, I was tight as a drum. A few words, a few steps: let go. Zen in motion.

It is said that the past informs the future. I say the future is a figment of our imagination. As is the past. When we to live in accordance with the dharma, there is no problem. And missing cat carriers are mysteries, not avalanches.

Be well.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Zen & Tautology

With palms together,
Good Morning Everyone,

This morning is cold and fresh. I woke with no agenda. It is both a light feeling and a frightening one. Sometimes our burdens, plans, hopes, and dreams give us a sense of place, direction, and stability, while at the same time, rob us of being awake.

As a Zen practitioner I practice to wake free and stand without bags. This requires a willingness to live without place, direction, and stability. Why? All places, all directions, all ground is delusion. We create our universe in each breath, in each moment, and with each step. We die, the universe dies. And as the universe dies, we are truly born. There is a reason the Ancients taught that we should die to ourselves. One cannot be awake and at the same time live in a fiction as if it were real.

Very challenging.

The world of duality is immensely seductive. I am this; you are that. This is better or worse than that. I win, you lose. Scores are kept. And so on.

One reason I so enjoy cold air (or hot air, for that matter) is that it has a way of bringing me to attention. Like sudden noises. Awake, alert, there, in the moment. In my recent studies I find circumlocution and tautology rule. Its a problem with theology. One puts a finger on something and it slips away, like mercury. Or one uses something to prove itself. Literal nonsense.

Yet, we still seek. We still strive. So, the practice is to remember to stop, let go, and be one.

Bless the chill in the air. It's a bell of mindfulness.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Death

With palms together,
Good Morning Everyone,

One of my Disciples, Rev. Kajo, wrote to the Zen Living list about her experience dealing with the recent death of her father. I am sending my reply to her this morning as my daily message. Below my reply is her original post.

Daiho Roshi

__________________

Dear Kajo,

Personal pain and personal suffering are different, but equally difficult for others to address with the one in pain and suffering. You have experienced the loss of your father's presence in your life as a physical being. You have experienced your family's insensitivity in not informing you immediately. Pain, yes. Suffering, well that is yours. We suffer as we hold on to thoughts and feelings, stringing them like beads on a necklace. Care needs to be taken not to allow this necklace to become a choker chain.

We experience, through our practice, the fact that there is no birth or death, only this moment. How can this help? The thought of it does nothing. The practice of it liberates us.

From a theological perspective, we must be careful not to make too much of a notion of a God with intentions. Does God throw dice? Does He look over every single event on every planet in an infinite universe? Can God even see? These ideas of God are projections on our part, I believe. We wish for, need, or want such a God.

Yet the simple truth of the matter is these ideas are idols in the mind. A deep understanding of the Infinite comes through our suffering. The pain we experience teaches us most specifically about our separation from God, rather than God's separation from us. One with the Infinite, what is loss? One with the Infinite, what is birth and death?

We Jews believe that we are infused with Ruach ha-Kodesh, the breath of God or the Holy Spirit. As Zen Buddhists we might at first blush, say "nonsense!" Yet, I see our essential Buddha Nature as this Infinite Breath. Breathing in, breathing out. What else is there?


May you embrace your pain and look deeply into your suffering,

Be well.

____________________
You must be as nothing in your own eyes.
Then you will be worthy of attaining true
self-nullification and your soul will be
merged with its root.

Rabbi Nachman

Harvey Daiho Hilbert, Ph.D., Roshi
http://jewbu.blogspot.com/
Telephone: 575-405-8522






--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: celia
To: ZenLiving@yahoogroups.com
Sent: Wed, October 21, 2009 9:25:06 AM
Subject: [Zen Living] Death

With palms together,
Dear Sangha,
I have studied intensiveley about death, accepting death, and not being afraid of it. I have found comfort in TNH's idea that when we die, its meerley because we were no longer able to manifest so we withdraw from the world. I like this thought a lot and it has been helping me accept my fathers death.
Everyone I see hugs me tight and tells me he is no longer suffering and is resting now. This is the hardest part for me. I keep wondering why God didn't take him earlier. I don't mean that to sound bad. I just mean that my dad was suffering for so long. Situations amd environment were not right for him to continue to manifest. What is it that keeps us alive when we suffer so much? ...and why do we still hurt? How, in buddhism can we free the pain that we feel when a loved one is suffering or the pain that we feel when our loved ones withdraw from the world?
Do we sit it out? In Christianity, we ask God to remove out pain and he does- when we let him. How in meditation do we learn to let it float by? Ibam in nob way bashing my Buddhist practice. I am simply looking for a way to find peace.
I know what my dad would say: "give it to the lord". What do we as Buddhists say?

Learning to accept my dads withdrawal from the world,
Rev. Kajo