With palms together,
Good Morning Everyone,
Zazen is the practice of seated meditation, we say, yet it is far more than that. Zazen is a state of being. What are the ontological elements? Steadiness, serenity, surrender, alertness, openness, in short, a state of being that is upright and aware.
We exist naturally in this state of being until we are encumbered by thoughts and feelings. We collect thoughts and feelings and store them for daily reference. They form a sort of vetting process for us. A process which, in truth, actually becomes a veil clouding our ability to see clearly.
My Clouds:
Growing up in poor in Miami, in a household headed by an addict and a co-dependent partner, I saw what other people had and I dearly wanted it. The good life, the life of leisure and fun. I saw in base relief, then, my poverty. Television helped with this, as well. It framed the world and taught me to turn my wants into needs. I had hope.
I saw, eventually, though, that the rich were rich and the poor were poor and never truly will the two actually come together. When they do, it is carefully orchestrated by handlers, as in the case of Movie and Rock Stars. The rich remain rich, the new-rich remain on the outside looking in, and everyone works to maintain the status quo in the hope that no one will notice. Meanwhile we at the bottom continue to bus the tables and wait on others. Still, I thought, I can beat this.
Great Doubt arises.
My hope, my sense of moving up in the world, seemed exposed as a childhood dream by the war. There were those who fought and those at home who fought to find ways out of the draft. Patriotism and trust in government was wrecked by Vietnam and that Dirty Tricks Master, Tricky Dick Nixon. This man, posing as a Quaker, carpet bombed Hanoi and relentlessly assaulted those who opposed the war. White hats were just a costume to hide the evil men do. These were like the swift strikes of a kyosaku. Wake up!
At home, the VFW told me they didn’t want “cry baby” Vietnam Vets in their organization. I was partially paralyzed, retired from the Army at 19, and often spent hours at a Royal Castle hamburger joint. One night, sipping coffee, I remember a police officer coming in and giving me the third degree. What am I doing there? I think, “What else does a kid retired at 19 do?” I caused suspicion, I suppose. Wake up!
Great Determination arises.
When confronted with doubt some of us collapse. Too bad. Life offers us whacks of the kyosaku to give us great doubt. Contrary to what we sometimes think, it’s not a test, in fact, it’s the real thing. Bad things do happen to good people. Life is not fair. Societies are not structured equally. Some of us have to walk to work…if we have a job to go to. Some of us have to make a choice between food and medicine. It’s all very sad, but it’s all life as it is.
I chose not to collapse. I get a GED. I go to college. I get married. I get a job. Life happens. Somewhere within me is a stubborn rascal. I am not going to go quietly into the night. One foot in front of the other. Washing dishes, baking pies, waiting on tables, taking crap from all sorts of idiots, I earn my keep.
Eventually, I get a Ph.D., start a business, and become successful. But who am I?
I have learned not to trust anything but my true self. What I have also learned is that “my” true self is “our” true self, the cosmos. A Ph.D., a successful business, and a life in service to others through that business, was not enough. The backward step demanded to be taken.
Great Faith arises.
When living fully awake, or when living asleep, life is what it is: a great metabolic process with no beginning and no end. In either case there is no difference. What differs is how we relate to it. To fully appreciate our lives we must surrender ourselves to the fullness of the universe itself. We must take that step off the cliff of doubt. Or jump off the pole of awakened being to make ourselves in the world. This takes faith, not courage. Faith that things are what they are, and unfold as they will, and that through it all we are what we are: human beings making choices.
In those choices our true self arises. In this there are no excuses. We are what we do, not what we would like to do, think we are, or try to be. I believe words like “try” “think” “want” are contemporary profanity because they, in fact, profane us. They are the words we use to deceive ourselves and others.
The Mantra of the Upright.
Get out of thought; get into action. Don’t try, do.
Be well.
Good Morning Everyone,
Zazen is the practice of seated meditation, we say, yet it is far more than that. Zazen is a state of being. What are the ontological elements? Steadiness, serenity, surrender, alertness, openness, in short, a state of being that is upright and aware.
We exist naturally in this state of being until we are encumbered by thoughts and feelings. We collect thoughts and feelings and store them for daily reference. They form a sort of vetting process for us. A process which, in truth, actually becomes a veil clouding our ability to see clearly.
My Clouds:
Growing up in poor in Miami, in a household headed by an addict and a co-dependent partner, I saw what other people had and I dearly wanted it. The good life, the life of leisure and fun. I saw in base relief, then, my poverty. Television helped with this, as well. It framed the world and taught me to turn my wants into needs. I had hope.
I saw, eventually, though, that the rich were rich and the poor were poor and never truly will the two actually come together. When they do, it is carefully orchestrated by handlers, as in the case of Movie and Rock Stars. The rich remain rich, the new-rich remain on the outside looking in, and everyone works to maintain the status quo in the hope that no one will notice. Meanwhile we at the bottom continue to bus the tables and wait on others. Still, I thought, I can beat this.
Great Doubt arises.
My hope, my sense of moving up in the world, seemed exposed as a childhood dream by the war. There were those who fought and those at home who fought to find ways out of the draft. Patriotism and trust in government was wrecked by Vietnam and that Dirty Tricks Master, Tricky Dick Nixon. This man, posing as a Quaker, carpet bombed Hanoi and relentlessly assaulted those who opposed the war. White hats were just a costume to hide the evil men do. These were like the swift strikes of a kyosaku. Wake up!
At home, the VFW told me they didn’t want “cry baby” Vietnam Vets in their organization. I was partially paralyzed, retired from the Army at 19, and often spent hours at a Royal Castle hamburger joint. One night, sipping coffee, I remember a police officer coming in and giving me the third degree. What am I doing there? I think, “What else does a kid retired at 19 do?” I caused suspicion, I suppose. Wake up!
Great Determination arises.
When confronted with doubt some of us collapse. Too bad. Life offers us whacks of the kyosaku to give us great doubt. Contrary to what we sometimes think, it’s not a test, in fact, it’s the real thing. Bad things do happen to good people. Life is not fair. Societies are not structured equally. Some of us have to walk to work…if we have a job to go to. Some of us have to make a choice between food and medicine. It’s all very sad, but it’s all life as it is.
I chose not to collapse. I get a GED. I go to college. I get married. I get a job. Life happens. Somewhere within me is a stubborn rascal. I am not going to go quietly into the night. One foot in front of the other. Washing dishes, baking pies, waiting on tables, taking crap from all sorts of idiots, I earn my keep.
Eventually, I get a Ph.D., start a business, and become successful. But who am I?
I have learned not to trust anything but my true self. What I have also learned is that “my” true self is “our” true self, the cosmos. A Ph.D., a successful business, and a life in service to others through that business, was not enough. The backward step demanded to be taken.
Great Faith arises.
When living fully awake, or when living asleep, life is what it is: a great metabolic process with no beginning and no end. In either case there is no difference. What differs is how we relate to it. To fully appreciate our lives we must surrender ourselves to the fullness of the universe itself. We must take that step off the cliff of doubt. Or jump off the pole of awakened being to make ourselves in the world. This takes faith, not courage. Faith that things are what they are, and unfold as they will, and that through it all we are what we are: human beings making choices.
In those choices our true self arises. In this there are no excuses. We are what we do, not what we would like to do, think we are, or try to be. I believe words like “try” “think” “want” are contemporary profanity because they, in fact, profane us. They are the words we use to deceive ourselves and others.
The Mantra of the Upright.
Get out of thought; get into action. Don’t try, do.
Be well.
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