Coping

With palms together,
Good Morning Everyone,

There is no sense in crying about the world, it has enough crying in it. There is no sense in worry, things are what they are. There is no sense in coping, it just gets us through the night. What is crucial is our willingness to deal with what is presented to us.

Dealing with something is quite different from coping with something. I do not like the notions contained in the phrase “coping skills” as these amount to Ora-gel for a toothache or a shot of whiskey when tense: Just soothers of nerve-endings, nothing more.

We rise and face our world, a world of our own construction, and ask it meet our expectations. We fail to realize our expectations are our fantasies, and the world we create reflects our lack of skill, our desire, and our lack of vision. We add to the world our problems, usually defined as unmet expectations, lack of basic needs or even higher needs. And go about kvetching.

Nike had it right, “Just do it”. Elegant. Direct. To the point. We practice Engaged Zen in his Order. Our way is to meet the world directly, offering what we can, withholding when necessary, and working through, hand in hand with those affected, the issues that confront them.

“Working through” is an old ego-psychology term and our lack of understanding it reflects our social norms. It is not a quick fix, instant karma, or salve. To work through something is to enter it. Like a entering a koan, we drop away the expectation of a solution and live with paradox or contradiction, duality or powerlessness. We experience our feelings, letting our grip on them open so they may slip away eventually, but not before processing their relation to our thoughts and perceptions.

We do. We suck it up. We “gird our loins” in biblical terms. Diligence is a necessary ally in our work. We experience frustration like a duck floating on water. Nibble here, nibble there, float on.

So today, experience your world as it is, not as you wish it to be. Notice. Process. Do. Enjoy. But watch out for the inclination to cope.

Be well.